=(

其实,
我不想
不想因为在一起了, 而影响彼此的学业.

其实,

我知道

知道越逼你, 你会读得越辛苦.

其实,

我不知道

不知道要怎么样, 去鼓励你让你有动力.

其实,

我更不知道

更不知道为什么, 自己又胡思乱想了.

=(

A quarrel night

Yesterday quarrel with him. A sad night for me. I noe its my wrong. Sorry my dear, for not take care myself carefully. I always let him get into a tension feeling. He scare, he worry, i still keep make things become dangerous.

Dear, you are best.
We dont keep get into sad situation, can?

Today, 25 August 2010. HE exam had done =)
Its quite easy as i expect. Yes!!
I think i can make it.
After exam, i met with my dear.
Almost a week din meet with him.
I miss him badly.
Then he give me a big hug, ok!! I feel my heart recover and warm already.♥
We went to JUSCO for lunch. =)
Then we saw ah Foo, Mr. lonely. XP

My dear.
He is worry me.
Till argue.
Actually Im hurt when saw those word in my inbox.
At the moment, I angry and dont wanna talk anymore.
I wanna cool down myself, if not I sure will quarrel with him.
After that I told him I wanna sleep but not, I on his blog and my facebook.
Then I post something that I dont know should vent to where and should tell who.
Then he suddenly sms me.
I know he 100% saw my post.
So Im waiting what he wanna to talk.
Cause I feel scare, I dont want start that quarrel again.
Cause 3 months is near.
I scare he say he is tired and he wanna let me go.
And suddenly, Wei Sheng and Meggy sms me.
They ask what happen with me and him.
Suddenly, I remember what i had told Wei Sheng and Tzee Aii before.
Dont simply let it go.
Yes.
Dont simply let it go.
Not so easy to have a second chance of happiness.
I still love him badly, why i wanna let him go.
Sometimes I should selfish.
Dear, forgive for my selfish.

Just a short post

From tommorow until 4Sept -------> exam week for me
My dear: 27Aug -------- 6Sept
Hope God will bless all of us from now on =)

5 subject I gonna take it.
HE - HUBUNGAN ETNIK, 25Aug (70% confidence)
ENG - ENGLISH LANGUAGE, 27Aug (90% confidence)
IA - INTRODUCTION in BUSINESS ACCOUNTING, 29Aug (60% confidence)
QS - BUSINESS of QUANTITATIVE STUDIES, 2Sept (30% confidence)
ME - MICROECONOMICS, 4Sept (50% confidence)

Conclusion: My QS SURE DIE!!! (+.+") sigh.DEAR!! how?? I really CHARM LIAO!! 555 (T.T)

Give one big big word to myself,

LAZY!!

第15天

现在是早上 11 点 44 分...
我线了几封信息给他都没有回我...
我知道, 他现在正打着篮球...
但是已经接近 12 点了, 还没打完吗?
还是他又像上次那样, 撞伤了...
很担心他...
还是我做了什么让他生气我所以不睬我?
唉...

我知道, 他最近都不是很开心...
一直都在意着那18天...
其实我也是怕的...
但是现实就是现实, 怎样都是要面对的...
以前, 我总是不喜欢面对现实...
但是我现在长大了, 我也明白现实是一种磨炼...
也许长时间的不相见能让我们的感情更稳固...
所以, 我选择当安慰的角色, 让他对我们的感情有信心...
唉...

而我...
最近一直都睡不着...
不知道为什么...
而且很不舒服, 想呕却又呕不出, 身体还烫烫的...
我想, 应该是压力的关系...
因为考试要到了, 我都还没有准备好...
甚至连一点应付考试的心情都没有...
唉...

现在是早上 12 点正...
等多一下我就要去JJ跟一粒蛋还有维森温习功课了...
DEAR, 你可以快点回我信息吗?
我开始没有安全感了...

loser in everything i had

I know what his thinking, I know what his hoping and what he want.
But I pretend to dont know and keep asking what his thinking.
Human always conflict, always dont know what they want. But actually, they are more likely to act as they dont know what they want. They try to escape, dont wanna fix what they are facing. It is human nature. Is normal, girl, you are normal, dont think that yourselves is abnormal. =)

I always pretend, always pretend to not care about anything. I always pretend do nothing. I let my mind fly itself. actually, I know what I want.

I want you.
I want you love me.
I want you care me.
I want you give me what I want.
I want you accept what I have.
I want you approve what I decide.
I want you listen what I feel.
I want you remember what I said.
I want you.
I want you.
I want you.
I want you.
BUT.
I dont want myself become so vexatious and selfish.
That its!
Is vexatious, I feel shame to its.
I want myself to become perfect.
I try to maintain my family, my friends and my ONLY ONE.
But I fail to do it.
I've try to make everyone beside me feel happy with me.
I want my family proud to has a girl obedient to them.
I want my friend happy to has a good friend as me.
I want my only one confident to me as a perfect girlfriend.

But now, Im feeling tired. Since I cant done what I want.

I cant make a good grades in my academic, I know actually my parent was dissapointed.
I cant always promises my friends, when they are hoping to happy together, I leave them and stay at home.
I cant make my ONE happy everyday, I know he will tired, everyday take care me, worry me, tease me happy.

Feel that myself is useless and tired.
What life am I having.
Fail in everything I want.
Is loser.

LINE 恢复了 =)

最近真的实在太久没有用电脑上网了...
因为电脑的网有问题, 只好用 0.FACEBOOK.COM 上网(免费)
谢谢DIGI!! I WILL FOLLOW U~~~ (>.<)

真的已经好久没有跟我那班朋友出去了...
想起之前一起出去癫的时候...
今天, 难得全员到齐, 但... 我却缺席...
大家, 对不起了, 因为明天还有上课, 晚上真的不能出来喝茶, 我真的好想出, 但...
点点的不开心...
唉...
感觉都忽略了他们...
内疚...
=(
答应你们...
SEM BREAK!!
9月4号以后, 一定得空和你们出去玩的...
一定的!!
我和她和好了...
大家都很小心地不再讲回过去...
(开心)
相信其他人也会很开心
=)

最近, 该怎么说呢? 酸甜苦辣样样都有...
酸---> 心酸, 想念朋友们, 以上所说的都是酸...
甜---> 和我的笨蛋已经2个月15天了, 感情越来越稳定, 几乎都没有什么大问题...
苦---> 最近时常发差不多一样的恶梦, 都是在发他会离开我的恶梦, 是因为3个月接近了吗? 我不知道...
辣---> 还有8天就考试了, 感觉超刺激的, 因为一直找不到读书的心情, 时间又越来越逼近, 哇...

我的心情就像打翻了调味料, 复杂得难以形容...
唉...

最近

好久都没有BLOG一BLOG了
"DEAR你也是啊~还不快快交功课~!!哈哈><"

最近,

没有什么特别的事情发生

啊有了!!

要不要上云顶咧??

上? 不上?

唉算了~

不要想这个先...

嗯...

FINAL EXAM 要来了!!!!

OH MY MAMAAAAAAAAAAA~

真的要开始好好温习了

DEAR啊~

如果我忽略了你,

不要生气我啊

=)

今天热死了~

跟我的笨蛋玩追追(还小咩)

=P

不好意思啦~

因为他没有梳头发去学校

那个样子真的是可爱到~~~

我可爱的笨蛋(>.<")

所以我就忍不住一直弄乱他的头发

他又弄回我

我只好追着他

衰公!!

我的头发乱了~

没有脸见人了啦~!!

还有

我之前答应过他我会努力做到的

我真的成功了!!

不再怕了~

耶耶^^

感觉

我们越来越稳了
不错不错!!
嘿嘿~

♥

final exam

还有几个星期
就 FINAL EXAM 了
担心
怎么办 ?
COURSEWORK 都已经难过关了
更何况是 FINAL EXAM !!
ALELUYA~
神呀救救我吧~
没办法
真的要开始认真温习了
以前
考试对我来说
就只是我读书生活的一部分
老实地说
我甚至是没有怎么看重
PMR , SPM
简简单单, 让它过关, 就算了
但是现在
我好像真的不能" 船到桥头自然直 "了
就像我的笨蛋所说的, 船没有了船长怎么驾到去桥头?
对啊, 现在我再不驾回我的船, 以后真的会沉船了
唉~
没办法了
我会努力读书的
少上网
少出街
少看戏
少发呆
少看漫画
少看小说
少玩乐
但是!!
我的笨蛋宝贝啊
我不会少了你的
=)

第一次

第一次
第一次在男朋友的面前掉眼泪
没想到, 自己在他的面前会显得那么懦弱
需要他的关心, 需要他的疼惜
感觉自己变得很渺小
好想就这样待在他怀里
什么都不要想不要烦地过一辈子
当然
这是不可能的
现实总归是现实啊

形容不到的感觉
他真的对我好好
只是就像他自己所说的
他会很自然地绑着我
但是
我不介意他绑着我
真的不介意
虽然我不能保证我以后会不会介意
以后的事以后再算吧
你说好不好?
=)

真的已经没有什么好挑剔的了
我总觉得是我自己给不了他信心
所以他才会这么地担心
唉~
在你面前哭了
笨蛋, 我又让你担心了
对不起啊
我的颈太硬了
整天想些有的没有的, 又没有坦白告诉你
答应你, 以后不会了
=)

Mahasiswa Games 2010 ( TARCOLLEGE )

31 / 07 / 2010 --- 01 / 08 / 2010 :
Tarc College Mahasiswa Games 2010 =)

我, 傻婆, 一粒蛋还有刘琵琶去做HELPER帮帮忙...(><)
为了这件事, 我跟我的笨蛋争论了几天...
(偷偷说)他怕我GAP仔~哈哈哈哈!!
本来不打算去的, 最后还是去了...
YEAH~
我的笨蛋没有跟我说一声就跑来陪我(开心)...
真的是笨蛋!! 陪我一起站在那边晒到满头大汗, 不过人家觉得很幸福啦(羞羞) XP

8月1号噜!!

耶耶~~~!!
跟我的笨蛋满2个月了(开心)
但是这个月发生了很多不大开心的事~
但是没关系啦~
现在不开心完他, 以后嘛开心咯(看我几厉害算) XP

我的笨蛋真的是越来越笨蛋~
不想我去做工...
怕我晒到, 怕我辛苦, 怕我GAP仔, 怕我被仔GAP...
他说了一句话" 为了那个衣服辛苦那么久...我买给你吗!! "
哈哈!! 我可爱的笨蛋~
那件衣服有意义的吗, 真的是又笨又可爱...
不懂是不是我用错方法教他了~
不用紧,以后教他的机会多的是...哈哈!!
DEAR啊~
今天太阳不晒, 没有下雨, 也没有被球打到~
唉~没办法, 谁叫我爱惨他了 =)

最近他的朋友老是说了一些话刺激他...
让他一直都很不开心(火滚)!!

the ONE i ONLY LOVE name YONG YONG SHUN !! Dear...don't care OTHER !!